Some Angels Are Fat by Job Darcy
It was definitely one of the worst times of my life. My wife says I
abandoned them but I call it setting them free. I was on my way to Salt
Lake City to live with a girl I had met a year before while up there on a
fraud that went completely sour the minute I showed up. Anyway, this
is how it happened:
“Ring, ring.”
“Hello.”
“Yeah, is Jenn there?”
“Yes, this is she.”
“Hey, this is Job, you know, the guy from Louisiana.”
“Oh yeah, I remember you, how are you doing?”
“Look I ain’t doing so well. Matter of fact, I’m doing pretty bad and was wondering like maybe if I could come up there and stay with you for awhile?”
Long pause...
“Baby, come home.”
Now I’m on the Greyhound bus, a one-way ticket from Louisiana to live with Jenn and her roommate, girls I didn’t even really know. I had all that I owned in a couple of suitcases and my mind was about as fucked up at it has ever been. My favorite thought was of suicide. I found much comfort in the idea. I hated everybody and everything and everything about everybody and to top it off I hated myself more than Ole Lucy hates my soul.
The bus was packed, I mean packed, full of blacks from front to back. They had people even sitting in the aisle but the seat next to me stayed empty. I’m pretty sure the look on my face said it all. Halfway through the trip, while my only company was pure unadulterated misery, I looked up and saw this great big fat girl turned around kneeling in her seat just staring at me.
When we made eye contact we just sat there in silence for a long while before she said, “Why don’t you try smiling.”
So I shot her a little smirk from the corner of my mouth and then she said, “Do you mind if I come sit and talk with you?”
I waved her to come on back and she moved through the aisle of legs and arms with the ease and grace of an Olympic ice skater. When she sat down next to me I couldn’t believe how pretty she was. I mean this girl was big but she was beautiful, with ocean blue eyes and long baby blonde hair. Her skin was quite remarkable. It was soft milky white without a blemish of any kind. How did I not notice this big beautiful white girl get on the bus?
She said, “Hi, my name is Carrie,” and started asking me what was wrong, why did I look so upset.
I said, “If I told you, you probably wouldn’t believe me anyways.”
She said, “Well tell me and let’s see.”
So I told her my woes and after I finished she said, “Yeah, you’re right. I don’t believe you, but let me tell you about myself.”
So she went into how three or four months ago she was just as miserable about life as I was and what she did was give her life to Jesus Christ and now her life was perfect and beautiful, that she was on her way to Salt Lake City because she’s starting college there and is going to be living in a dorm on some college campus, that she was Mormon and that if I give God a chance he would do the very same for me.
It wasn’t fifteen minutes later she starts telling me something about how much she loves doing the itsy-bitsy spider. I asked, “What’s that?” Before I know it, Ole Girl is sucking my dick on a crowded bus in broad daylight. I put a pillow over her head while she performed, all while her huge ass was hanging out in the middle of the aisle. It was a perfect moment in time, and when I released she made sure there wasn’t a lick of evidence left. I took the pillow off her head and she got her big beautiful ass back into the seat and out of the aisle. She wiped her mouth with her sleeve and then reached over to hold and cuddle with me.
I said, “Oh no, Bitch, there ain’t going to be none of that!”
She said in shock, “I can’t believe you just called me that after what I’ve just done for you. I bet you don’t even remember my name.”
I said, “Oh, I remember your name. Why don’t you Carrie your fat ass on back to your seat.”
She let out a gasp in disbelief and got up and went back to her seat.
I sat back thinking about everything and remember thinking to myself, “Yeah, Job, what the fuck are you worried about, Man? It ain’t nothing. This shit ain’t nothing.”
I immediately fell into a deep sleep, deeper than ever, as if nothing was all there ever was. When I woke up it was about midnight and there she was kneeling in her seat just staring away with the biggest prettiest smile ever. I waved her on back and from Albuquerque all the way to Salt Lake City—fellatio!
Amen.
“Ring, ring.”
“Hello.”
“Yeah, is Jenn there?”
“Yes, this is she.”
“Hey, this is Job, you know, the guy from Louisiana.”
“Oh yeah, I remember you, how are you doing?”
“Look I ain’t doing so well. Matter of fact, I’m doing pretty bad and was wondering like maybe if I could come up there and stay with you for awhile?”
Long pause...
“Baby, come home.”
Now I’m on the Greyhound bus, a one-way ticket from Louisiana to live with Jenn and her roommate, girls I didn’t even really know. I had all that I owned in a couple of suitcases and my mind was about as fucked up at it has ever been. My favorite thought was of suicide. I found much comfort in the idea. I hated everybody and everything and everything about everybody and to top it off I hated myself more than Ole Lucy hates my soul.
The bus was packed, I mean packed, full of blacks from front to back. They had people even sitting in the aisle but the seat next to me stayed empty. I’m pretty sure the look on my face said it all. Halfway through the trip, while my only company was pure unadulterated misery, I looked up and saw this great big fat girl turned around kneeling in her seat just staring at me.
When we made eye contact we just sat there in silence for a long while before she said, “Why don’t you try smiling.”
So I shot her a little smirk from the corner of my mouth and then she said, “Do you mind if I come sit and talk with you?”
I waved her to come on back and she moved through the aisle of legs and arms with the ease and grace of an Olympic ice skater. When she sat down next to me I couldn’t believe how pretty she was. I mean this girl was big but she was beautiful, with ocean blue eyes and long baby blonde hair. Her skin was quite remarkable. It was soft milky white without a blemish of any kind. How did I not notice this big beautiful white girl get on the bus?
She said, “Hi, my name is Carrie,” and started asking me what was wrong, why did I look so upset.
I said, “If I told you, you probably wouldn’t believe me anyways.”
She said, “Well tell me and let’s see.”
So I told her my woes and after I finished she said, “Yeah, you’re right. I don’t believe you, but let me tell you about myself.”
So she went into how three or four months ago she was just as miserable about life as I was and what she did was give her life to Jesus Christ and now her life was perfect and beautiful, that she was on her way to Salt Lake City because she’s starting college there and is going to be living in a dorm on some college campus, that she was Mormon and that if I give God a chance he would do the very same for me.
It wasn’t fifteen minutes later she starts telling me something about how much she loves doing the itsy-bitsy spider. I asked, “What’s that?” Before I know it, Ole Girl is sucking my dick on a crowded bus in broad daylight. I put a pillow over her head while she performed, all while her huge ass was hanging out in the middle of the aisle. It was a perfect moment in time, and when I released she made sure there wasn’t a lick of evidence left. I took the pillow off her head and she got her big beautiful ass back into the seat and out of the aisle. She wiped her mouth with her sleeve and then reached over to hold and cuddle with me.
I said, “Oh no, Bitch, there ain’t going to be none of that!”
She said in shock, “I can’t believe you just called me that after what I’ve just done for you. I bet you don’t even remember my name.”
I said, “Oh, I remember your name. Why don’t you Carrie your fat ass on back to your seat.”
She let out a gasp in disbelief and got up and went back to her seat.
I sat back thinking about everything and remember thinking to myself, “Yeah, Job, what the fuck are you worried about, Man? It ain’t nothing. This shit ain’t nothing.”
I immediately fell into a deep sleep, deeper than ever, as if nothing was all there ever was. When I woke up it was about midnight and there she was kneeling in her seat just staring away with the biggest prettiest smile ever. I waved her on back and from Albuquerque all the way to Salt Lake City—fellatio!
Amen.
